These few days haven been seeping well. Had violent nightmares. To think about it gives me the creeps. My brother was saying: no wonder you keep kicking me, one day i'll be killed by you. haha. I woke up with slight bruises and I guess its those i kicked against the walls.
Anw, been thinking about certain things. 1) what if something rules over the passion of serving in a ministry? 2) the world of deceits 3) the change of my shepherd
Isn't it scary if one day you choose to leave God because you choose bgr over God or you cant let go of sth that u hold dearly to. Or worse still, best of both worlds. Well, we all know that there's no such things as best of both worlds if we want to focus on one thing. Either God, or man. I used to think that I can handle both balancely, till recently i realised that you will fall eventually if you hold on too tightly to something that is not of God. And mind you, even godly man aren't perfect.
Deceits. Well, this hurts the most. Not experiencially. But I keep hearing people discussing about it. Your close friend don't share with you what's happening in their lives. You always thought that its all well but there's something hiding behind our backs. Certain things you found out and wanted to hear it from the person yet he/she twist and turn the story. Isn't it scary to have this kind of friend? When you thought that the person already let go of something but failed to realise that he didn't all these while? And making use of you as if you were the other person? Someone else's face and your body. Darn. What stupidity. Sometimes you just want the truth, yet the person is keeping mum about things. Sigh.
yay. On a happier note, im changing shepherd. New start, new direction. I felt like I haven been shepherded for a thousand years and here I am, with a new shepherd. I hope to take intiative tho. :)
Alright, having UT later. Gonna ciao to study for it. Bye.
