Wednesday, January 10, 2007
@ 12:07 AM
Courage, courage courage. When will I ever get the courage to tell? I shall make a decision. Today shall be the day. I will take the first step. Go elise! you can do it. First step to success is to come out of fear.
Hello Daniel,
guess i dunno how to tel u. So i shall post it since im better in expressing myself here. Guess ive not been doing well last year. Alot of things happened, things go wrong, friends thingy and many others. These somehow make me lose my confidence in God and in everybody else. I dun dare to trust, believe, seek help etc. Wanted to tell u long time ago, but i din know when is the right time. But i think the HS has been telling me to open up, to trust in him again. Last year was a disastrous year towards the end to the point that I dun even know what's my conviction abt things of God. What keep me serving till now and all. I think ive lost the passion somehow or another, yet I wanna build a church for him at least once in my lifetime. I dunno what I want yet I know I wun give up because of what ive promised God. I dunno whether Im doing things for the sake of doing but on the other hand i wanna disciple my people to be strong. Ive become numb towards problems yet wanting to solve them. Worst of all, i dunno whether im in or out.
But i know that i promised to support you, to do my best, not to let ruth and God down, that's why Im still here. After all these years of hard work and toil, if i were to give up now, isn't it a waste? And, i still remember my baptism answer. Yes, I will follow him to the end till Jesus returns. That's why im telling u these. N telling u about my blog. I took great courage just to pen down all these. I hope u understand what I mean.
elise
I have big dreams for God. Church planting, building the youths, making impact everywhere i go. But sometimes i know that i will be overcomed by problems/setbacks in my life. Which will drag me down gradually. Therefore, i declare that friends meant alot to me. and I DO NOT have close relationship with any females in the church. Trying to build relationship with winnie tho. But i hope i wun be trying to hard to fit into somewhere I do not belong to. Guess that's abt all. Im fine. And i wil pull myself up again to complete the race just like the one that Shirley shared during service. And daniel, you will be the one supporting me when i fall again and we(the dmm) will be supporting u as we run the race together, facing all the setbacks/ problems as a team. Thanks for being there to listen and to dicern. Let God be in the center of our lives.
elise
